Holes in my brain...

I wish I remembered things. Entire thoughts, actions, moments are gone from my memory and I can't get them back. I can lay in the grass and stare at the clouds or stars and I'll forget why I lay there. I forget why I start each step with a right foot. I forget where I lost my soul and most importantly I forget why I forget. Circles it seems. I need some momentary locking mechanism to hold me in place for even a split second. So maybe in that split second I can remember why I forgot why I forget and I can start remembering the important things in my soulless life.